


Zutara Week 2016

by claireandelide



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Don’t copy to another site, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-20
Updated: 2016-08-20
Packaged: 2020-04-23 02:21:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19141636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/claireandelide/pseuds/claireandelide
Summary: originally posted in my oneshot collection "No Matter Where You Are"backdated.





	1. dragons

_“My grandmother would tell me stories of how the Northern Water Tribe adapted soulmate marks into their betrothal process shaking off the practice of arranged marriages._

_“She’d show me her necklace and share how she hadn’t met her soulmate until she left her home. The moon and waves mark she bore on her forearm was mirrored in her betrothal necklace._

_“I had a feeling my soulmate wouldn’t be in the Southern Water Tribe and our stories would be reverse images: her sojourn south and mine north.”_

Katara was fourteen when her mark appeared and she’d never seen anything like it before. It was a strange creature, nothing like the fan and boomerang Sokka had on his ankle.

One day a mother with a boy her age saw her mark and made a loud “tsk” sound. She must have thought Katara was out of earshot when she noted, “The Chief’s daughter will have a hard time receiving a betrothal when the Spirits gave her such an ugly mark.”

Katara started covering her mark after that. She knew her mark set her apart and most her fellow tribespeople would never leave the glacier.

She would leave, and she wouldn’t let their negativity weigh her down.

When she and her brother found the Avatar, Gran-Gran showed no reluctance in letting them go with him to the North Pole.

“The Spirits long revealed you would be leaving our land of ice and snow,” she said quietly.

Katara figured the Northern Tribe would know what this strange creature was.

“Nice dragon, Katara.” Aang pointed to her mark.

They were practicing waterbending and she had removed her cuff.

“Dragon?” The word felt foreign on her tongue. It felt like a word you’d use in a spell, evoking images of majesty and  _power_.

“Yea, they have loads of them in the Fire Nation or well had.” Aang frowned pondering, “I hope there are more, it has been a hundred years.”

_Fire Nation._

Katara felt as if she’d been spun around. Her mark was a creature native to the Fire Nation.

Aang never asked what the mark meant. Stories of being bound to another according to the design of the Spirits wouldn’t interest a child seeking the next adventure. He continued practicing while she got dressed.

Now, Katara  _had_  to keep the mark hidden. The prejudice she’d face for being branded to wed a Fire Nation soulmate wasn’t one she was ready to bear. It was one she’d have to overcome herself. Whenever she’d look at her mark, she’d see the enemy.

_Gran-Gran what am I to do?_

The excitement of finding a master to teach her waterbending replaced her excitement of finding her soulmate in the Northern Water Tribe.

She kept the news to herself. Sokka would worry if he found out. He had a hard time changing his mind on most things.

Suki had done a wonder getting him to see female warriors as both feminine and strong. A miracle.

Sokka rubbed his ankle tenderly after they left Kyoshi Island. 

Katara wondered if he would start carving a necklace and invite Suki into their Tribes’ tradition. 

                                                          ^^^

The Northern Tribe was under seige.

Katara was surprised to see the older man who accompanied Prince Zuko in the spirit’s oasis.

She was put on edge but something about him calmed her. He was an ally. She wondered if it was her soul mark wearing away at her prejudice.

He protected Katara and Yue while the Fire Nation Admiral sought to attack the moon spirit.

General Iroh, they’d call him.

 _To be a general and turn against your country even as the tides favored you._ Katara felt something stir in her. 

The Fire Nation got away. The moon spirit was dead.

The reverence General Iroh showed to the spirit widened Katara’s respect for him.

Her cuff must have come off in the stillness that followed Yue’s sacrifice. He asked in a quiet voice if she knew what her mark was. 

There was a peace she hadn’t felt as she nodded.

He smiled at her.

                                                         ^^^

The next time Katara saw Iroh he was on their side, attacking Azula. She felt his gaze on her wrist.

But they had Azula cornered and now was not the time for either of them to discuss his fascination with her mark.

Azula shot forth blue fire that struck Iroh and she felt her heart leap into her throat. Azula got away and Katara knew she would be a force to be reckoned with.

Zuko held up his uncle and the emotion on his face drew the sympathy Katara could never control when someone was in need. After the North Pole, she felt indebted to Iroh.

“Zuko, I can help! I have healing abilities.”

But, he wouldn’t listen and Katara would never forgive him if his emotion clouded judgement cost Iroh his life.

                                                        ^^^

Training Aang and preparing for our next strike occupied Katara’s time.

Her childish fantasies of what meeting her soulmate would be like were swept away by the realities of war and her Spirits-destined role in it.

Ending the war would be her only way to live in peace with  _him_.

Ba Sing Se felt like the first victory in so long. They were on their way to turning the tide of the war and getting a succession of moves to force surrender.

Katara was too stunned to see Zuko in Ba Sing Se to process his uncle was ok.

They’d work too hard to let them throw it away. She wouldn’t let it fall apart because of temporary and emergency alliances.

Only to run into a bigger trap giving vital information to Azula. 

So, Katara tried to ignore her guilt when Zuko joined her in the crystal catacombs.

More of her prejudice unravelled as they talked. This sense that everything would be fine disarmed her defenses. She felt herself relax as their walls came down and she saw a boy barely older than her brother. Someone looking for an answer.

And she offered him one; an answer his uncle affirmed. The one he’d reject.

When Zuko evened the fight between Katara, Azula and Aang, part of his soul mark peeked out from under his sleeveless tunic. He pulled back his arm and it came into plain view.

Katara’s throat constricted at the sight of her soul mark on his collarbone.

_Zuko?_

He caught her off guard.

Azula caught Aang off guard.

Katara held onto clarity for as long as she possibly could to heal Aang. The Spirit water couldn’t do anything for her bruised heart.

Sokka thought her depression was in reaction to Aang’s touch and go situation. But her heart was reeling because of another bender.

                                                        ^^^

Katara saw Zuko in every fire nation boy. It hurt to be reminded of this Spirits-forsaken bond forged between them.

To be betrayed by your soulmate after he’d given you hope and you offered so much.

She almost doesn’t believe it when Zuko finds them in the Western Air Temple. Her eyes and heart had been playing games on her for so long. 

But when the others responded, she realized it’s not an illusion. He’s really there.

She settled on ignoring him. She needed the space to process, to heal.

She wondered if his uncle told him of their matching marks. She wanted to ask about the Firebender, who pardon the pun, warmed her to the idea of being fated to a fire nation boy. Even if she didn’t know it’d be their Crown Prince.

But Zuko winced every time Iroh’s name was uttered and if she wasn’t so hurt, she’d try to unravel why.

Zuko offered to assist Katara in avenging her mother. Her traitor of a heart flipped. His face was set: He wanted to earn her forgiveness even if it would strain his friendship with Aang and Sokka.

And he supported me.

Katara wasn’t sure if it was a soulmate phenomenon or the result of so many battles but they worked so well together. She refused to over think it. She wouldn’t.

The relief of closure urged her to let go of her other grudge.

She  _saw_  Zuko for the first time in Ba Sing Se. But here on the dock, she saw  _Zuko_  and everything in her stilled. She hugged him and wondered where their story would go.

                                                        ^^^

Katara stood by Uncle Iroh during Zuko’s coronation.

“He’s grown so much,” she whispered.

“Yes he has.” The emotions she fought to hide coloring his words. 

“You must be so proud.”

“He has become such an admirable young man.”

“Have you told him?” Katara touched the cuff covering her soul mark.

Iroh shook his head. “That is best for you two to discover.”

Katara thought the odds were stacked against her before. Worlds separated her from him and the war before betrayal.

Now it was time. Time for him to find out. Time for him to accept.

~meet me in the garden~

Lanterns led Katara to a bench where she sat.

“Katara?” Zuko met her in the clearing. “Close your eyes.”

She obeyed.

Zuko took her hand and laid something cool into it. “You can open them.”

Her breath caught. It was a necklace — a water tribe betrothal necklace with their soul mark on it.

“When did you find out?” Wide eyes surveyed him.

“My Agni Kai with Azula.” He smirked. “You reached up to hug me and your cuff was gone.”

“And you’re ok with this? I’m not of Fire Nation descent.” The necklace still limp in her palm. She played with the dark red ribbon.

“Katara, I’ve been in love with you since I saw you again in the Western Air Temple. You picked up where Uncle left off pushing me towards my best, cheering me on at my worst.” Zuko sat besides Katara cautiously putting his arms around her. He laid her hands in his, palms up. “In no way would this replace your mother’s necklace –”

She looked up at him in shock. “You jumped in front of lightning for me and you didn’t know we were soulmates?” Tears burned in Katara’s eyes. 

Zuko rested his forehead against hers. “– and I’ll wait for your response,” he continued.

“Zuko,” she sobbed. “I’ve think I’ve waited long enough.” She wrapped her arms around him and felt him pull her closer. “My answer is yes.”


	2. reincarnation

“You know what’s weird?” Zuko folded his hands on his chest. He and Katara were staring up at the stars in her palace’s atrium. Katara insisted they lay on the floor.

“You?” Katara teased.

Zuko pretended to pout shoving her softly. “I’m being serious.”

“And I’m not?”

He didn’t answer.

Katara turned on her side to face him. “When I met you, it felt like we were starting where we’d left off.”

“Like we knew each other before?”

“Yea, but we hadn’t met before.”

“I thought I was the only one who could move an element with my emotions,” Katara mused.

“Me too.”

“I mean of all the galaxies, you’re the only one.” She examined Zuko. “Come to think of it, I did feel like we’d known each other for years.”

“Centuries,” Zuko amended.

Katara let the dots connect. “Could it be possible?”

“How?”

“Multiple lives?”

“Our souls keep finding each other?”

She smiled taking his arm and snuggling against him. “What fortune to meet you and fall in love over and over again.”

Zuko smiled. “The beginning wasn’t picture perfect.”

“Who’s fault was that?”

“Certainly not mine,” he chuckled.

“So it’s mine.” Katara narrowed her eyes at him in jest.

“Maybe there’s blame to share.”

“Maybe?”

“You’d think I’d learn by now.”

“Honestly,” she guffawed.

Zuko felt his heart burst at her joy. But their conversation gnawed on his attention. “Why do you think our souls haven’t found rest?”

Katara saw the anxiety on Zuko’s face. “Maybe it’s not a bad thing.”

“I want to be yours forever. I want you to be mine forever. I don’t want to worry about losing you in the next life.”

“Stop it. Just think positive.”

“You can’t say you don’t feel it, like this has gone on for too long?”

“What would it mean though?”

“I don’t know, Katara, I just need assurance.”

^

How did they keep finding each other? Azula planned their punishment so well and yet life after life they’d meet and fall in love.

It didn’t matter what obstacles she threw at them. They worked it out.

Zuko needed to cast his vote for their father’s plan. It would tip the scales of the council of gods they sat on. But, her brother chose that water goddess over her.

So, Azula made him pay. They’d never enter rest. Their essences would be reborn again and again across alternate universes. 

And again and again they would foil her plans without trying.

^

Iroh wouldn’t let his niece have her way. 

The darkness that had corrupted his brother and niece would not taint his nephew.

Zuko had fallen hard and fast for the water goddess. Katara saw the good warring for dominance in him and took hold of that. She drew it out of him like water from a well, and Zuko cleansed himself in the refreshing flow.

It took a while before Iroh saw that Zuko pushed Katara to her best as well. Deep waters conceal a lifetime of secrets. They’d jump into the furnace together and leave refined. They did it for love, for each other, and themselves.

Azula couldn’t understand. She had little capacity for things outside of power and strategic gains for herself.

Iroh couldn’t anticipate Azula taking such drastic measures at Zuko’s decision. But, he could mitigate it.

When Zuko and Katara reincarnated, he’d cross their paths again and again until they merged. He’d grant them this one happiness.

^

Katara sensed the storm coming.

“We should go inside.”

“What?” Zuko tugged on her hand. “Afraid of a little lighting?”

It was harmless teasing. Katara knew it was, but something felt wrong. She opened her mouth to protest.

There was a huge flash of lighting. It struck right in front of them. Zuko pushed Katara back as she pulled him out of the way.

The girl stood where the lighting had struck. She shone like the sun and crackled with raw power, electric.

She seemed so familiar.

Bow down, their humanity screamed.

But Katara and Zuko stood defiant.

“I see your pride rises with you every cycle, Katara,” the girl spat.

“Who are you?” Katara stepped to stand beside Zuko.

“Your worse nightmare.” She smiled as her hair began to float. She directed her hands and lighting crackled in the paths she drew. She sent it towards Katara.

“Get down!” Zuko pushed her. They hit the ground. He took the brunt of the fall.

Katara stood first.

He pulled her to run.

Their hands stayed intertwined.

“We should split up,” Zuko suggested. They hid behind a wall.

“It’ll be too easy for her to pick us off.” Katara shook her head.

“We’ll find each other again. We always do.” He rested his forehead against hers. It felt so true. It felt like the well-worn path his soul had tread before. Trust what works.

“If I’m going out, I’m going out by your side Zuko.” Katara tightened her grip on his hand.

For the millionth time, Zuko fell in love.

“Fools.” The girl appeared before them again. “This time it’ll be your end.”

Azula.

Zuko saw a sister who craved power more than love.

Azula made the motions again.

Zuko and Katara threw their best at her but she zapped through his fire and broke free from her ice.

“It’s useless,” Azula sing-songed. She drew lightning. Zuko felt the hairs on his neck and arms begin to stand. 

She trapped them in electricity. It ran through their bodies. 

“You had to keep choosing her,” Azula seethed. “You gave up everything for her and it still wasn’t enough.” She raised the intensity and they cried out. “Now you’ll never get it back.” She went to her max. She watched them take another breath.

Brightness shone. Zuko and Katara stood. 

They should be dead. No mortal body could withstand that.

Zuko flicked his wrist and the lightning dissipated.

“You’re right Azula: this ends today.” Katara raised her hand and water crashed against the lighting goddess sweeping her away.

Azula sputtered. Impossible. A light flashed and Azula shielded her eyes.

“Azula.” Four voices called in unison.

She raised her eyes and saw four figures stand before her. The Elders, four ancient beings who policed the council of gods, stared at her in judgement: Kuruk, Kyoshi, Roku and Aang. Four elements that all balanced each other.

“For too long we’ve let your rage run unchecked,” Roku began.

“Zuko and Katara have again and again defeated you. Yet you did not let them be,” Kuruk continued.

“Your vindictive path must end,” Aang rebuked.

“This ends now.” Kyoshi waved her hand and Azula felt herself being pulled back into a void that swallowed her scream.

^

Katara woke up.

“Sugar Queen!” Toph sat up.

“Toph?”

“How are you feeling?”

“Like I’ve been walking for a lifetime,” she groaned.

“That sounds about right,” Toph chuckled.

“What do you mean?” Katara looked around. She wasn’t on the galacial planet where she faced Azula. This was familiar, if not a distant tickling memory. Grays and chromes and silvers. Pristine, prestigious. Not the warm tones seen through mortal eyes. “Where’s Zuko?”

“Katara!” A hand slammed against the open door frame. Zuko panted as he stared at her.

“Zuko!” Katara swung her legs over and ran up to him. “What happened?”

He smiled down at her. “Didn’t I tell you we’d always find each other?”

“Good you’re both awake.”

Zuko and Katara stepped back as Iroh approached them.

“Uncle.”

“Zuko, Katara, it is so good to see you.”

“What happened?” Katara asked for a third time, concern hanging in her tone.”

“A long journey has come to its end. Love has triumphed”

Zuko snaked an arm around her waist and squeezed her.

“But,” Iroh continued, “we can tell these stories another time.” 

“Stories?” Katara shrieked in shock.

“Lifetimes of stories.” Toph mentioned, joining them.

“I can see the fragments,” Katara pouted looking at Zuko.

“Me too.” He nodded. “Oh what fortune to have met you and fall in love with you again and again.”

Katara scrunched her nose at him. “I know you can do better than that.”

“We have an eternity for me think of another one, Katara.”


	3. memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hades/persephone AU

“This is your home,” Mother Earth would whisper to Katara stroking her hair and forehead. _  
_

And Katara wouldn’t have reason to doubt if she didn’t always feel so cold.

Which didn’t make sense. Katara remembered cold rains and how much she loved them. She  _loved_  the cold, but now it made her sad.

In the peak of summer and deathly heats, Katara got glimpses of a land of fire, and demons, and lost souls. The sun reflecting in pools of water reminded her of golden eyes and the prince of the lost souls.

_This is your home._

_Home. He wasn’t home, the keeper of lost souls._

Katara touched the brim of her sunhat as she tried to remember more.

“Katara, what’s wrong?” Mother Earth stopped weeding.

“I’m okay,” a half truth. Enough to appease Mother Earth.

_Warmth, heat, home._

_Not hers but for long enough._

_Help._

_Mother Earth taught her to help every living thing._

_Zuko!_

Katara shot up.

“Katara!”

“Why can’t I remember?” Katara blurted.

“Remember what, pup?”

 _Pup_?  _Katara was a woman, grown. Condescending? Mother Earth never used that tone._

Katara knelt back down to weed. Mother Earth continued weeding. Katara picked up her trowel and a chill settled in her spine.

“Mother Earth, where’s my trowel?”

“That’s yours, pup.” She didn’t look over.

Katara’s hand shook. The trowel had her first initial carved into the handle. But it was for a child, and it looked like a toy in her hand.  _Didn’t it fit in her hand yesterday?_

_Katara was a woman not a child._

_How many of her memories were missing?_

_Zuko_.

Katara frowned as she dug out weeds. A rock.

_Rocks and darkness._

She looked around: grassy plains.  _Rocks and darkness must be where Zuko was._

By the time Mother Earth decided they’d done enough, Katara had a long list of memories associated with Zuko.

_Zuko who wasn’t home, but had been banished. Zuko who wasn’t sure if he could go home. Zuko who wasn’t sure if he wanted to go home._

Katara hadn’t understood at the moment what he meant or felt. She did know.

_He needed help._

As soon as Katara remembered how to get to him, she’d go.

                                                          <—>

Zuko didn’t know how to care for a living thing, although Uncle Iroh taught him how to care for the flames like children. But she knew how to care for something near death.

_Katara._

She had stumbled into Hades as she ran from Mother Earth. Her soul was untethered; she didn’t have a home and couldn’t leave until she chose one.

Zuko was the prince of lost souls, a fitting domain for a banished god, forever the scapegoat. He couldn’t understand how someone would choose to give up their home voluntarily.

But, he’d build one for her.

Seasons and cycles he understood: birth then years of growth followed by death.

Zuko knew her time in the underworld would end. Each thing had its cycle. Katara would be no different. She’d realize anything was better.

He watched her play with Cerberus. She looked happy.

“I never want to leave,” she giggled scratching under his chin.

Zuko hated the seed of hope sprouting in his brain. He couldn’t let his emotions trump reason.

All things come to an end.

The underworld wasn’t a home; it was a prison.

But Katara would smile at him and he’d forget that, and Zuko would only think of the moment, of him and Katara.

So when Mother Earth allowed the planet to die in mourning, Zuko didn’t use the opportunity to gain entrance back into Olympus and use her as a pawn. He knew the end was coming, but he wanted to hold on longer.

“Mother Earth is looking for you.”

Katara narrowed her eyes, defiance overcoming her features. “So?”

“She’s killing the planet. Thousands are dying.”

“I’m not going back,” Katara replied weakly, her resolve visibly wavering.

“For all these people? You will.” Zuko placed a hand on her shoulder. “You wouldn’t be able to bear the burden of those lives.”

“But Zuko, you –”

“I’ll be fine. But you need to go.”

“There’s got to be another way.”

_But all things ended._

“Katara.” Zuko leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “Go home.”

She grabbed his shirt and held on. “Zuko, I am home.”

“You need to save those people.”

“And who will save  _you_?”

“Who will save you?”

“Zuko,” she pleaded.

“Katara please.”

“I’ll be back.”

Zuko didn’t tell her Mother Earth wouldn’t allow it. He nodded his head.

Katara rose on her tiptoes to kiss him. Zuko watched her come closer.

_Why do all things need to end?_

He met her halfway.

                                                         <—>

Katara opened her eyes. She dreamed about Cerberus.  _Zuko’s dog – three headed beast. He liked to burrow and would escape –_

_Escape!_

Katara sat up in her bed. She remembered how to get back to Zuko.

_I won’t let Mother Earth bully me into leaving him._

She would make her case before Olympus. Uncle Iroh would be an ally.

_What if he doesn’t remember?_

Katara paused. She gritted her teeth clenching her jaw.  _Then we’ll build new memories._

                                                         <—>

“Zuko!” Pounding footsteps echoed into the hall.

Cerberus lifted his head and wagged his tail.

“Zuko!”

Cerberus sat up and barked. Zuko turned and felt his body turn slack.

“Katara?”

She ran towards him.

_How?_

“Zuko!” She laughed reaching for him.

His stomach flipped at the sight of her. She looked radiant. 

“Katara!”

When Katara reached the first step of his throne, Zuko left his stupor and rushed to meet her. He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up. He spun her around. She laughed squeezing her arms around his neck.

“You remember me.” Katara stated, breathlessly.

“How could I forget?” Zuko pressed kisses against her cheek and neck.  _You came back._  He pulled her closer to himself.

“Zuko, I’m home.”


	4. lilac

“How’s Katara?”

Sokka considered Zuko before answering. He’d been fielding that question all day and Zuko’s question seemed  _different._

“She’s falling apart,” he answered truthfully. Sokka felt the emotion tumble in his stomach, his heart, his head.

Zuko rested a hand on his shoulder. “How are  _you_?”

“Would you believe me if I said ‘fine’?” Sokka joked, weakly. He could tell Zuko was fumbling for the  _right_  next words to say. “The surgery was successful. My dad slept most of the day and the doctor predicts a smooth recovery.”

“So what has Katara…”

“Freaking out? She’s probably beating herself up. Being a nursing major and all, she might feel guilty that she didn’t figure out what was wrong.”

Zuko frowned, “That’s unfair of her.”

“I know, but once Katara gets in that framework it’s a done deal.” He crossed his arms. “It’s not like a ruptured appendix is something overt.” He sighed. “I wish Gran-Gran was here and not visiting Pakku.”

“Why? What would she do?”

                                                           <  ^ >

Katara couldn’t bear silence; it reminded her of the hospital. She  _normally_  couldn’t stand silence, but everything seemed connected to her dad.

Since Sokka forced her to come home, she’d been laying on her bed in her room. Katara found solace in the dark, swimming in one of Sokka’s old hoodies, listening to the jazz mixtapes Hakoda made for Kya. Her hand stroking her mother’s necklace.

_I could have lost him._

Katara knew not to think like that and sink into “what if?”s. Like what if she had remembered the ‘rebound test’? Or what if she hadn’t stayed home with her dad. What if she’d call 911 instead of running out when the robbery was happening? What if she’d save her mother?

“Katara?” Sokka’s voice shot like an arrow tethering her to the present.

He slowly opened the door. “Katara?”

“Mhm?” Katara rolled over to face him.

Sokka sat on the edge of her bed and it reminded her of Hakoda so much she nearly pushed him off to end the mirage.

“Everyone’s sending good wishes.” He shook her phone. The one she’d left on the kitchen table. The one that was currently blowing up with notifications.

“Can you clear the notifications?

Sokka nodded. “I’ll put it back on the table.” He stood.

“Thank you.” She shifted into a more comfortable position.

“Oh, and someone sent you a gift.”

Katara didn’t move until her brother put a brown shopping bag in front of her. She sat up and opened the bag. Sokka left before she could ask

Tea sachets. Uncle Iroh must have sent it. Gran-Gran must have asked him to.

Katara pulled out the snacks and bath bomb. She sighed. Everything she was neglecting.

She took Sokka’s hoodie off and walked to the bathroom. A warm bath was what she needed.

Katara’s tension dissolved as she lowered into the water. There was lavender and lilac in the steam coming from the water.

Gran-Gran always knew she needed to be in “her element” to get a clear head; whether to pacify emotions or figure something out for school.

_“My little mermaid,” Gran-Gran joked._

Sokka had a cup of tea waiting for her when she got out. He’d stepped out again, leaving a note for her on the table.

Katara took the tea back into her room. She opted for leggings and a t-shirt. 

Climbing back into bed, she knocked the care package bag over.

*clack*

She peaked over the side of her bed and saw something sticking out of the bag. She picked up the cd case.

<please press play>

Following the prompt, Katara put the cd into her radio. She expected songi horn arrangements and was surprised to hear modern songs playing.

Songs of grief. Songs of hope.

Katara laid down and dissected the songs. She was distracted enough to fall asleep.

                                                          <  ^ >

Sokka woke his sister up. “I’m going to see dad; do you wanna come?”

She nodded getting out of bed.

“How are you feeling?”

“Better.”

“Good.” He slung an arm around her.

“Did Gran-Gran call Uncle Iroh?”

“Not that I know of why?”

Katara frowned. “How did you get the package from him?”

“You didn’t read the note?”

_Note?_

Sokka picked up the bag and then the cd case when he didn’t find what he was looking for. He handed the case to her.

Katara opened the case.

_Zuko._

“Zuko talked to Gran-Gran?” Her eyebrows rose.

“Nope.” Sokka headed to the front door.

Confusion flashed across her face.

Katara texted Zuko: <thanks> She hadn’t picked up her phone in what felt like ages.

It lit up when he responded: <of course>.

She responded to his text ignoring the others. <no really, i appreciate it. it was super thoughtful.>

_You’re really thoughtful._

<i was in your shoes with uncle’s heart attack. i know what i would have needed>

<this really means a lot to me>

Ever since the surgery, Katara had been numb and hadn’t realized until now. 

<anything for you> was closely followed by <haha :)>

She felt that thought warm her. 

It made her think of how older generations lamented digital communication would isolate the younger generation. With all the texts she’d received, it was a physical outreach that would make her feel remembered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inspired in part by [the survival kit](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/10191879-the-survival-kit?from_search=true)


	5. fever

“Was that Katara again?” Sokka smirked.

“You seem to conveniently make these comments when she’s gone. I wonder why.”

“What? A guy can’t tease his best friend?”

Zuko glared at him.

“All I’m saying is you’ve been sneaking around. Could get a guy suspicious.”

Zuko jumped. Sokka was smart, but did he figure it out already? “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he snapped.

“C’mon Zuko. I’d have to be blind not to put two and two together.” Sokka crossed his arms. “What? Did you guys think I wouldn’t notice?”

“Sokka, I think you’re imagining things.”

“Nice try, but it’s my big brother duty to make this kind of stuff my business.”

Zuko’s eyebrows knitted. “I’m confused.”  _Wasn’t he talking about the surprise birthday party?_

“You and Katara.” Sokka wiggled his eyebrows. “C’mon.”

“What about us?”

“Dude, you totally have the hots for my sister!”

Zuko felt a blush leap into his cheeks. “Katara?”

“Yea,” Sokka drawled.

Zuko felt caught in a difficult spot: lie and throw Sokka off-track ,or leave space for Sokka to continue snooping.

“Uh, it’s not like that…”

“What do you mean it’s not like that?”

Katara shoved open the apartment door. “I forgot my planner.” She analyzed the two of them. “What’s going on?”

“I should be asking you that.” Sokka grinned mischievously.

Katara looked at Zuko who shook his head.  _No, he doesn’t know._ “As much as I’d like to get tangled in whatever is going on in your head Sokka, I need to run.”

Zuko kept his eyes firmly on the ground as Katara grabbed her planner from the table and walked back to the door. He didn’t want Sokka to catch him looking at Katara, no matter how innocuous, and give any more fodder to his crazy imagination.  

“Call you later, Zuko.”

Once the door closed, Sokka mimicked his younger sister, “Call you later, Zuko.”

_Maybe I should call off this surprise party._

                                                          >^<

“I forgot to ask the other day what was up with you and Sokka,” Katara mentioned casually, stuffing more invitations into envelopes.

Zuko hoped Katara wouldn’t ask. He hadn’t figured out a way to get himself out of it with Sokka. He didn’t need to juggle Katara’s reaction too.

“Cus he keeps asking if I have a date every time I let him know I’m coming over,” she added.

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sokka’s suspicious. He jumped to the conclusion that we were dating behind his back because we were spending so much time together.” He rubbed the back of his neck.

“And you couldn’t correct him because then he’d start snooping and probably find out about the party.”

“Probably being the operative word.”

Katara laughed. “I guess we have to put up with the teasing a little bit longer.”

“Are you sure? Calling off the party would be a lot easier,” Zuko offered sarcastically.

“I don’t think that would solve the problem.”

“What makes you say that?” Zuko looked up from his work. Her face was twisted in concentration. “When you two moved in together around when we first met, Sokka mentioned he hoped we’d hit it off. He said he wouldn’t push it, but he could see us together.”

_Oh._  

“So I don’t think calling off the party would do much for the teasing. It’ll just turn into scheming.” She finished. She played with the ends of her hair.

“How does that make you feel?”

Katara laughed, mirthlessly. “I wish he’d mind his business so we wouldn’t need a cover story.” 

“So that’s our cover story?”

“You think you could handle this? Can you make it sound believable?”

“What are you trying to say Katara?” Zuko grinned.

She opened her mouth to retort when they heard rummaging in the kitchen. They started packing up evidence of the party.

Zuko opened his bedroom door. “Coast clear.”

Katara followed him.

“Hey baby sister.”

Zuko and Katara jumped.

“Sneaking around? Very suspicious.” Sokka wore the same smirk from before. “Care to share what you two were doing behind closed doors?”

“Doctor-patient privilege. We were just talking  _Sokka_.”

Zuko envied how quickly she could pull together a lie.  _Maybe I should have never suggested a surprise party._

“That’s not a blanket excuse,  _Katara._ It’s limited in scope.”

“Zuko told me he wasn’t feeling well and I forgot I wasn’t in the office and closed the door before I asked him the standard questions.”

“Zuko,” Sokka turned to him, knowing he couldn’t lie. “How are you feeling?”

“Homicidal.”

Katara giggled. “Figured it out. Avoid Sokka and that should clear up. Later.”

The front door clicked and Zuko braced himself for Sokka’s rebuttal.

“Sounds more like you’ve got a fever, Zuko. Katara fever.”

                                                         >^<

Zuko couldn’t keep his eyes off of her. The apartment was full of Sokka’s closest friends and Zuko couldn’t stop staring at his baby sister.

How or when he didn’t know. Seeds he didn’t give much weight to had taken root. At first he considered them weeds, but the beauty of the wildflowers prevented him from uprooting them. If he could.

“Sokka should be here soon.” Katara laid a hand on Zuko’s arm.

He nodded, not trusting his tongue.

Someone turned off the lights.

“SURPRISE!”

Sokka held the apartment door knob as he took in the scene in front of him. “How did I not see this coming?” He shrieked.

Katara met Zuko’s gaze and winked as Zuko rolled his eyes.

Zuko focused on keeping the party afloat, not the Sokka would let it go flat. But Sokka would overlook little details like enough soda in the fridge or enough paper plates.

“Hey bud.” Sokka laid an arm around Zuko. “Suki said you came up with the idea.”

“Yea. You’re like a brother to me. Of course I’d do something special for your birthday.”

“I’m impressed Zuko.. You can’t usually keep things like this under the radar.”

“Well Katara helped.”

“I need to go find her. Talk to you later.”

Zuko sailed through the rest of the party without much incident. A heated game of Taboo was the extent of disaster.

He just needed to avoid any road blocks until  _everyone_ went home.

“Hey Zuko can we talk?”

“Yea what’s up buddy?”

“I want to apologize for teasing you these past couple of weeks. You must have wanted to strangle me.”

“It might have crossed my mind.”

“I realized you and Katara were just planning the party. I should have seen this coming.”

“I’m glad we could surprise you.” Zuko chuckled.

“I was  _so_  sure. You would make these faces at Katara that just screamed adoration.” Sokka frowned, closing his eyes in thought. “Even if you weren’t dating, I thought you might like her. I figured gentle nudging would help. But I guess it was just wishful thinking.”

Zuko held his breath. Sokka knew he couldn’t lie.

“Right Zuko?” Sokka fixed his attention on his roommate. Zuko didn’t make eye contact. Sokka put a hand on Zuko’s shoulder. “Guess I get my cake and eat it, too.”

Zuko glared, frustration masking his nerves.

“C’mon. I have faith in you.” Sokka clapped him on the back gently. “Suki?” He called out.

“Yes?” She called back meeting them in the kitchen.

“Let’s go get some ice cream.” Sokka winked at Zuko.  _Go get her._ He mouthed.

“Sure.” Suki smirked realizing why Sokka had a sudden craving. “When are you going to leave them alone?” she whispered.

Sokka took her hand, shushing her. He gave Zuko a thumbs up before closing the door behind them. 

Zuko swallowed walking to where Katara watched television.

She smiled at him. “Pop a squat.” She moved so he could sit on the couch.

Zuko sat and flattened his hands on his knees. “Sokka apologized for the teasing.”

“He apologized to me too. I think it clicked while he was thanking me,” she chuckled.

“I guess it’s good to know he won’t freak out.”

“Freak out about what?” Katara turned her attention away from the television.

“If we ever started dating.” He tossed out gauging her reaction.

Katara considered it. “Yea,” she murmured.

“Never mind.” Zuko crossed his arms. This wouldn’t be the first time he let Sokka talk him into a half-baked plan. This was rushed and foolish. He needed something grander.

“Zuko?”

Zuko jumped. The television was off and Katara frowned at him in concern.

“Yea?”

“You can talk to me about it.” She touched his arm.

“Can I?”

“Why wouldn’t you be able to? Is everything ok?”

“I don’t know!” 

“You don’t know what?” Katara snapped. She would return verbal blow for verbal blow when people got short with her.

Zuko took a deep breath.  _Last thing_   _I need is to fight her._  He groaned. “It just–You seem –”

“Does this have anything to do with Sokka asking me if I have ‘Zuko fever’?”

Zuko was going to strangle Sokka.

“He made that up when we said I wasn’t feeling well.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Yes. Remember he thought we were dating.”

“Why does this fluster you so much? We spent six weeks with him assuming and you’ve only recently let it get to you.”

“You’re so confident Katara. Any guy would be lucky to be with you. You don’t worry about rejection. So you couldn’t possible understand.”

“And you worry about rejection?” She asked, gentler, softer than before.

“All the time.”

“What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”

Zuko’s heart sped up. Katara squeezed his arm.

“Tell me.”

“I’d…”  _Where would he start? Baby steps._ “I’d ask you if we’d still hang out even though the party’s over.”

“Yea of course.” Katara lowered her eyebrows.

Zuko took a deep breath. “But then I’d only do that so I could work up the nerve to ask you out.” He lowered his eyes. “Maybe I’ll absorb enough of your confidence that I’ll handle the rejection.”

Katara didn’t respond at first.

His insides tore up in the suspense, but Zuko couldn’t look at her.

Katara made a sound and Zuko finally looked at her.

“You thought I’d reject you?”

“I-I don’t know maybe more like I wanted to be prepared for a long shot.” He blushed the more she stared back at him. 

“Maybe it wasn’t that far away.” She shook her head.

Zuko processed what she said. Katara chewed her top lip as he thought it over. She scooted closer to him, trapping him between her advance and the armrest.

His heart raced as he leaned towards her. Katara closed her eyes when their foreheads brushed.

“This is okay?” Zuko whispered, pausing.

Katara nodded, gently. She closed the distance, brushing her lips against his. He sighed. 

_Agni_. 

She pulled back and Zuko felt dread replace the butterflies in his stomach.

“My answer is yes.”

Zuko rested his forehead on her shoulder. “Yes to what?”

Katara wrapped her arms around his shoulders. “Yes, I’ll go out with you.”


	6. coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a/n: based on @classical-crap‘s [post](http://charlierejouis.tumblr.com/post/142727732606/the-sassy-composer-classical-crap-why-has)

There were two seats in front of  _his_  stand. Zuko clenched his jaw.  _Stand partner._

He was gonna be a junior and he shouldn’t have to share a stand.

He sat down and started warming up. He laid his violin across his lap and looked through the music in his folder.

Zuko stilled as a Water Tribe girl sat down next to him. She reached for her folder and leafed through the music before unpacking her violin.

When she noticed him watching her, she sat up straighter.

“Hi! I’m Katara. Looks like we’re stand partners.” She smiled.

Zuko shifted to resume skimming through his music.

He heard Katara exhale.  _Dramatic._

_Why did nothing go his way?_

Zuko counted down practice measure by measure. He put his violin in his case before Gyatso even dismissed them. He got ready to make a beeline out of the door and mourn the bust-of-a-ensemble semester.

“Zuko, a word.”

_As if the day couldn’t get any better._

He met Gyatso at the piano.

“I know you anticipated not having a stand partner this year especially considering your hard work last year. And, normally I don’t give first violin stand partners.” Zuko scowled but Gyatso continued, “But this was a necessary step. The first and second violin parts are a little more complex this year; something you and Katara’s skill allow us to attempt. 

“They rely on each other. The delicacy of the harmonies require the two parts to be in sync. Blend will make or break the piece. Other than requiring an extra weekly practice for the two of you, sharing a stand was the next logical solution. You’ll be able to hear each other and start to build a rapport that will translate into the music. you’ll be surprised how much you two have in common.”

Zuko bit back a sarcastic comment and nodded. Of course Gyatso would have it figured out. Of course, he’d have the luck of being a junior first chair  _and_  having a stand partner.

                                                     ~     ~     ~

“Good moring,” Katara greeted.

“Good morning,” Zuko mumbled back.

Despite what their first encounter suggested Katara was barely functional for the moring Wind Ensemble class.

The two fell into a civil relationship swapping “Good mornings” and the occasional pencil.

“ _Someone_  didn’t practice,” Zuko quipped under his breath. He nearly jumped out of his seat when Katara whipped her head in his direction.

“Excuse me?”, she hissed.

“First cello,” he specified immediately understanding the miscommunication.

Katara’s eyes sought out the senior cellist. 

Gyatso, also hearing something was off, asked for the cellos to play the section again. 

Zuko could see Katara squinting out of the corner of his eyes. Katara snorted at an egregious mistake. Her hand flew to her mouth as heat flushed her face. Zuko fought back laughter.

When Gyatso stopped the cellos to correct them, she slapped Zuko’s arm.

“Don’t get me in trouble,” she warned.

Zuko raised an eyebrow at her. “Whatever you say Snortles.” He couldn’t help the smirk as she fumed.

She wouldn’t be able to help the future giggles at his under-his-breath-commentary.

                                                    ~     ~     ~

“Do you freshmen even sleep?” Zuko watched Katara rest her head on the lounge table.

“We have this huge exam coming up to determine whether or not we can take pre-med courses a year early.”

“And you’re taking Wind Ensemble on top of that.”

“You say that like you don’t play two instruments and aren’t a business/poli sci double major.”

“But I get eight hours of sleep.”

“Tea doesn’t factor into your sleep.”

“Coffee would at least help you stay awake if you gave yourself enough time to get it.”

Katara stuck her tongue out at him.

                                                   ~     ~     ~

Katara looked awful.

She’d make it to Ensemble  _right_ before it began. Her intricate hairdos replaced with sloppy buns. Her bright yet sleepy “good morning”s replaced with sorrowful “hey”s.

“Exams that bad?” Zuko asked, concern weighing down his eyebrows.

Katara shrugged. 

“How do you take your coffee?”

She squinted her eyes at him. “Why?”

_How could she be this skeptical with such little sleep?_

“Humor me.”

“With soy milk and three sugars.”

“Ok. C’mon.”

“Zuko,” Katara protested. The bags under her eyes spoke louder.

Zuko took her violin case. “Katara stand-up.” He shouldered his case.

She rolled her eyes and followed him.

They got caught in the pre-10 am class rush at their coffeehouse on campus. Katara leaned against Zuko. He  _didn’t_  hold his breath as she started to doze off shuffling closer for support. 

“Why don’t you find a table to sit at and I’ll bring your coffee to you?”

“No, too warm,” Katara mumbled.

The girls behind them giggled and Zuko blushed.

“Fine,” he grumbled.

Zuko ordered and paid for the drink. Katara opened her mouth to object but was interupted by a yawn.

“You fell asleep standing up.” He thrusted the cup in her hands.

“Soy and three sugars?”

“Just how you like it.”

Katara smiled.

Zuko pouted to keep from smiling back examining the ceiling tiles. “We can’t have you falling behind and dragging down the violin section.”

“Sure Zuko, whatever you say.” She slipped her hand in his.

_Just his luck._


	7. candles

Zuko felt the wear in his bones. He could finally sleep easy, but he’d never felt  _so_  tired. 

He couldn’t imagine what actually serving as Fire Lord would feel like.

The others in the Gaang looked just as fatigued as he was but he felt as if there was more.

“Zuko?” Suki sat at his table in the Jasmine Dragon. “I haven’t seen Katara in a while; I’m a little worried. She can handle herself, but she’s been acting strangely.”

Zuko had noticed it too.

The Hundred Year’s War was over and yet another hurdle stood before them. The aftermath of fighting and conflict loomed ominously. Parents and teachers had showed them how to fight, but not to cope.

“I’ll look for her,” Zuko nodded.

“Thank you. Sokka’s been overwhelmed lately and Katara doesn’t want to make him worry.”

“I’ll find her.” He stood. “Take care of Sokka: make sure he sleeps.”

“Of course, Fire Lord Zuko,” Suki smiled kindly.

Zuko pinpointed places Katara would have found to hide. Each turned up empty.

Zuko stopped at a stall to buy lunch.

“Mommy! Mommy!”

Zuko smiled to himself as the little boy tugged on his mother’s hand.

“Yes dear?”

“I just met Sifu Katara.” Zuko’s breath caught. “She’s at the memorial. She said she’d look out for me tomorrow. Can we go back?”

Zuko didn’t catch the mother’s response as he turned for the memorial.

 

Memorials had popped up everywhere; each nation remembered their fallen in different ways. The Water Tribe released floating lanterns. The Earth Kingdom used obelisks and engraved names of the fallen into the stone. The Fire Nation filled halls with portraits, some done professionally most rough sketches.

Ba Sing Se a haven for refugees and different perspectives opened large buildings where loved ones could be honored.

Zuko stepped in and took in all the candles. He read the welcome. <Light a candle to usher a lost loved one into the spirit world.>

He walked around.  _There were so many candles._ It made his heart heavy; the gnawing feeling that accompanied his fatigue amplified. Zuko knew war came at a steep price, but to see how many families it affected tore at his heart.  _There needed to be an era of peace._

Zuko’s eyes swept the next room and he spotted Katara. Katara bobbed a thin, long candle over unlit candles. She shuffled over on her knees and lit more then did it again.

Zuko knelt beside her. “Can I help?”

Katara nodded.

They fell into a rhythm: Zuko would light every other candle with his fingertips and Katara would light the remaining with her candle.

“There are so many.” Katara mumbled and Zuko barely caught it.

“There are.”

“It’s not fair.”

The anger in her voice made him flinch. Guilt spread in his chest.

“This war is not – was not fair.” She slammed her fist against the floor. “So many children are gonna grow up without a parent or either parents. Villages destroyed. Lovers separated. So many dreams crushed. All for what? Power? Control?” Katara cursed and it was foul.

Zuko watched Katara tirade. It was more fascinating when not directed at him. The guilt eased in his chest as he heard the ache he felt in her speech.

_It wasn’t fair._

“I feel like I have to keep the spirits company.” Katara bent forward to light a candle.

“Funny, I feel like they’re clinging to me.” Zuko did the same.

Katara placed a hand on his shoulder. Zuko noticed the same cloud  _he_ felt hovering over  _her_  head. 

“We’ll do better, Katara. Our children, our grandchildren won’t have to deal with this.”

“I hope so.”

“I won’t rest until there’s peace. I know you won’t.”

“Like I told Aang, I can’t think about the future right now.”

Zuko nodded lighting another candle.

“There’s a boarding house full of widows from the earlier years of the Hundred Years’ War. They don’t have the strength to come light candles. And you know it’s new so they haven’t had a chance to formally honor their husbands.”

“Suki was worried about you. You would disappear for the entire day.”

“I’ll talk to her tonight.”

“Have you been eating?”

“No,” Katara mumbled.

“Katara,” Zuko sighed.

“It’s nice to have someone look out for me.”

Zuko froze and waited for Katara to laugh or make a joke. “What do you mean? Your brother and Aang look out for you.”

“It’s different with you.” She shook her head. “Like that time Azula attacked us in the Western Air Temple and you got me out of the way of those falling rocks? Or when we were training on Ember Island and you covered my back? Or during your Agni Kai with Azula?”

“I-I have so much to atone for.”

Katara shook her head. “No you don’t. You have nothing left to prove.”

As Zuko continued lighting candles, Katara’s words chipped away at the burden he carried. It was so much easier earning the others’ trust, but with Katara it was different. They’d become friends and facing Yon Rha had been a huge breakthrough. There was a thaw, but Zuko felt jumping in front of Azula’s lightning made Katara feel indebted to him and her feelings weren’t genuine. He glanced at her.

Katara’s smile said otherwise.

The two reached the last candle.

“Let’s get you some food.” Zuko stood offering his hand to Katara to help her stand.

Katara took his hand and hugged him. “Thank you.”

He stroked her hair. She squeezed him. He felt her sigh before he stepped back.

“If you ever want to talk about the spirits clinging to you, you can talk to me about it.” Katara held his forearm.

“If you ever need someone to keep you and the spirits company, you can ask me.” Zuko offered back in return.

Katara’s mouth fell open in shock. Her lungs expanded with air, but she didn’t exhale. She hesitated, her awe replaced with suspicion. She whispered.

Zuko ducked his head to try and catch it. “What?” he whispered back.

“Don’t tease me about that.”

He shook his head. “I wasn’t teasing.”

“There you go taking care of me again,” she mumbled, wrapping her arms around him again.

Zuko knew Katara didn’t want to talk about the future, but he wanted to let her know he’d always take care of her. She’d always have a place in the Fire Nation and she could always take refuge there.

 

But for now he’d just hold her and make her eat dinner.

 

The spirits would have to wait.


End file.
